- Spend several minutes trying to turn my car on with the key to my room
- Put a dirty knife into the refrigerator and come dangerously close to dropping a jar of peanut butter into a sink full of soapy water
- Start panicking because I can’t find my cell phone, only to discover that I am holding it up to my ear
- Refer to Africa as a country (I’m cringing right now)
- Act astonished that Scrabble comes in a Spanish version…um no, it’s just the same alphabet, Emma
So. Now that I’ve exposed my most Darwin-award-worthy moments (or at least a teeny tiny fraction of them), I’m hoping that the next laughable thing on my list will seem a little less laughable. I’m talking about these pie pictures, of course. The pictures that I took on my iPhone at 8pm in the yellowy artificial light of my kitchen with my dad standing two feet away practically salivating as he waited for his slice. Unfortunately my brother won’t be home for the holidays until tomorrow; otherwise I would have clearly taken advantage of his photography skills. Which are about 10,000 lightyears above mine.
Thus, instead of making you all wait even longer for my next post (I know it’s been over two weeks and I’m sorry!) I decided to have a long, hard laugh and offer you these fantastically grotesque pictures along with a pretty stellar recipe. Use your imaginations!
The truth is, this is a pretty darn delicious apple pie. I love how the crust is spiked with a hint of cinnamon and nutmeg, and the filling is a perfect balance of sweet, tart, and spiced. I used a combination of Granny Smith and Honeycrisp apples, which I would highly recommend. The filling itself is quite simple–just toss together some standard ingredients and fold in the apple slices. Pour it all into your pie crust (which, I’ll admit, is the harder part that I have yet to perfect) and bake until golden and bubbly! You’ll end up with a house that smells so good you’ll want to bottle it up and put it into a candle. And of course you’ll get a delicious apple pie, too. Horrid pictures aside, this recipe is a keeper!
All-American Apple Pie
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon (optional)
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg (optional)
1/3 cup cold unsalted butter, cut into small chunks
1/3 cup chilled vegetable shortening
4-5 tablespoons very cold water
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground allspice (or 1/4 tsp nutmeg + 1/4 tsp allspice)
6 cups apples, peeled and thinly sliced (about 6 medium apples; I used 3 Granny Smith and 3 Honeycrisp)
1 egg, beaten
Granulated sugar, for sprinkling
For the crust, whisk together the flour, sugar, salt, cinnamon, and nutmeg in a large bowl. Using a pastry blender or two forks, cut in the cold butter and shortening until the mixture is coarse and crumbly. Add in the water one tablespoon at a time, tossing with a fork, until the dough holds together. Form the dough into two equal balls, wrap in plastic wrap, and refrigerate for at least 30 minutes.
Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F. For the filling, combine all the ingredients except for the apples in a large bowl. Fold in the apples until they are coated in the mixture.
Roll out the dough into two 12-inch circles. Carefully transfer one of the crusts to a 9-inch pie pan. Press the crust into the bottom and sides of the pan, leaving a 1/2-inch overhang along the sides. Pour in the apple filling and top with the remaining crust. Crimp the edges.
Cut several slits into the top crust. Brush the beaten egg onto the top and edges of the crust. Sprinkle the crust with granulated sugar. Cover the edges loosely with strips of aluminum foil and bake for 35 minutes. Remove the foil and bake for an additional 10-20 minutes or until crust is golden-brown and filling is bubbly.
Let the pie cool for at least 30 minutes before slicing. Store leftovers in the refrigerator.
(Recipe adapted from Land O’Lakes)